Bristol Palin of the now trademarked Bristol has written a book about how much she is for life and this book is now in the process of bringing our country one step closer to Armageddon, so mission accomplished, Palins. The good news is that Bristol tries unsuccessfully to draw first blood out of Meghan McCain and her mother, Cindy.
The leaks of said “book” were reported by various outlets, including Good Morning America, without any fact checking, but why would they do that when Bristol is going to be a guest on the show and they can’t risk upsetting her, so steel yourself, Americans. We’re jumping on yet another runaway Palin Ponzi scheme with the Palinistas ordering Bristol’s book from Amazon only to drive it up in apparent sales, with deviant plans to cancel the orders after the sales rankings make a good show.
In other words, no one is going to read this book but you are still going to have to hear about it around the water cooler. Such is American life in the pre-post-Palin age. Is there any saving grace to this scourge upon humanity? Only if you have a dark sense of humor and are desperate to take a break from reality. So, yes. Yes, there is a silver lining.
In the book, Bristol takes up her mother’s mantle of getting even disguised as writing a memoir. In the “leaked” portions of the book (aka, promotion/publicity stunts), we find that Bristol not only calls the father of her child a “gnat” and accuses him of semi-possible but not overt rape, but also goes in for kill against the McCain family. Seriously, nothing could disturb me more than having to defend John McCain (without whose desperate Hail Mary we would live in a blissful Palinfree news world), so thanks again, Palin family.
Here’s a taste of how the Palins do it, courtesy of ABC News (yes, this is “news” now):
Palin writes that the first time she met the 26-year-old daughter of Sen. John McCain, she “ignored us during the entire visit.” This was just before Senator McCain introduced Sarah Palin as his running mate. Palin adds that she “had a sneaking suspicion I might need to watch my back.”
“Every time we saw Meghan, she seemed to be constantly checking us out, comparing my family to hers and complaining,” she writes. “Oh the complaining.”
Cindy McCain, the senator’s wife, also rubbed the eldest Palin daughter the wrong way.
“I’d never seen people with so much Louis Vuitton luggage, so many cell phones, and so many constant helpers to do hair and makeup,” Palin writes, adding that the would-be first lady looked “like a queen” and held “herself like royalty.”
Palin writes that she was shocked when the senator’s wife offered to be a godmother to her unborn baby: “I had just met her and I wondered why she wanted any type of guardianship over my child.”
Yes, because we all know we have never heard a Palin whine.
Somehow I doubt that Meghan McCain was comparing her family with the Palin family and feeling she got the shaft. And then we have Bristol Palin, who flipped America off on TV, jump on her imaginary high horse about manners. Perhaps I missed the time Meghan McCain told America to F-off on TV or called herself a slut or called an ex a gnat or called gay people horrific names or…..Yeah, NO. Just no.
As for Bristol watching her back, I’m sure the feeling was mutual.
And then the petty, bitter, jealous ode to the elite regarding the clothes and make up people and Louis Vuitton luggage – this coming from the daughter of the woman who grifted over $250,000 of clothes from the RGA, using a donor’s credit card like a drunk buying endless rounds of it-was-cool-yesterday shots for her family (but only her family, no one has ever accused Sarah Palin of generosity) while the thirsty stare from behind red ropes. Miss Palin is, after all, a part of the now infamous line, “The Wasilla hillbillies looting Neiman Marcus from coast to coast.”
Miss Palin, as the daughter of a woman who has since turned into the most obvious of social climber fails — wearing garish logos on every visible part of her body while building and buying house upon house and charging hundreds of thousands of dollars to speak on issues she supposedly cares deeply about, even charging special needs organizations for her bendy straws and jets — should know better than to throw stones of ostentation from glass Nouveau Riche houses.
Ms. Palin (the Mama version) bought little 6 year old Piper a $3,000 Louis Vuitton bag with the RGA money (because this is how we teach our children to value a dollar). But we are to hate the McCains for their Louis Vuitton because – they have MORE than the Palins do. Bad McCains. Wannabe carpetbagger says to carpetbagger, “Shame on you! You’re good at this.”
Sarah Palin was angling to become Ivana Trump years ago, and it looks like she has made inroads to that end, which I’m sure satisfies her. She and now her daughter are getting quasi rich (not real rich, not old money rich, not indestructible rich – read, not McCain rich – but pretty darn comfy) off of their gig of playing the victim while they attack people from levels too low to have been foreseen. That’s quite the claim to fame.
As for Bristol’s outrage over Cindy offering to be a god-mother, perhaps Cindy had reason to believe that Miss Palin might be in need of some spiritual guidance regarding child-rearing. If Cindy did think that, it’s a safe bet that this tabloidy, Jerry Springersque book only reinforces and justifies her concern.
I predict this will not end well, but first we will all be subjected to even more of the Palin hot dog routine of American “politics” (that’s trademarked, bitches!). Can we bear it? I’m on my last leg with these clowns, readers.
Make it stop. Make it stop. Make it stop.
The Palins beg and plead to be attacked by attacking first. They say outrageous things about people most of us are OK with, or even respect and then sit back collecting the attention like sniffing dogs on a truffle hunt, pouring greedily over their juicy treasures like the sub par contributors to society that they are.
Because of that, I refuse to say what we are all thinking about Bristol going after Meghan McCain. Let’s face it, the two young women do not occupy the same space. Meghan McCain is a smart, beautiful young lady who is attempting to bring the Republican Party into the modern age of reason and liberty for all, whereas Bristol’s family is dragging the GOP down to a heretofore unseen publicly level of ugliness fit for a reality TV show about an armchair McCarthy klanner.
Bristol’s desperate darts have not hit their target; she has failed to draw first blood. If there is one thing the McCain women have on the Palins, it’s that they know how to handle better bullies than the Palins. The McCains, after all, survived the Bush Rove 2000 attacks.
Step back, Bristol. You are out of your league.