Rush Limbaugh managed to take a break from his daily diet of attacks on President and Michele Obama to take aim at a new target, my website, PoliticusUSA. What inspired Rush to attack us was our amusement over Limbaugh’s warning to his listeners that Michelle Obama is coming to take their furnaces.
Apparently, Rush doesn’t like being laughed at.
The fun began when Rush described us as, “Folks, would you believe I have been raked over the coals. Remember this story we had yesterday toward the end of the program that indoor heating has led to a bunch of overweight, obese people? So I report the story, and then I suggest wait ’til Michelle Obama hears about this, she’s gonna show up and try to take away our furnaces. I have been raked over the coals by some outfit called Politics USA. They think that’s one of the meanest things that I’ve ever said, how can I be so stupid? Wait ’til you hear this. It’s hilarious.” (We don’t feel bad about Limbaugh getting our name wrong. He does it to everybody, right Stephen Coalbert?)
Ok, so far this doesn’t sound much the piece that I wrote, but I am intrigued, so Mr. Limbaugh please do continue, “All right, Politicususa. It’s an obscure leftist blog, serving my purposes well today. They say they do “Real Liberal Politics.”….Rush claimed that he was “tweaking” us. Now it should be noted that tweaking is compulsive behavior that is often associated with methamphetamine abuse, but that is neither here nor there. It’s just a little fun fact you can use around the water cooler at work today.
Rush broke out his standard defense that I lack a sense of humor, “She’s coming to take away your food. She goes to Walmart, tells ‘em what they have to sell and what they can’t sell at what price. This was all in a discussion of, “How many ever heard of Michelle Obama five years ago? Now all of a sudden she is the nation’s foremost health expert. She is the nation’s foremost food expert,” and why? Not because she’s an expert but simply because she’s the first lady, and… (laughing) These people have no… It’s a waste of time to even explain it but they obviously have no sense of humor.”
Limbaugh claimed that I am too absurd to understand his absurdity, which is a lot like claiming that a person is too fat to understand fat, “You take what’s obviously — and they have no sense of satire or parody. But Michelle Obama is taking over school menus. She’s doing everything they can. That’s her cause is obesity, so it makes total sense to say, “If she figures this out, if obesity really matters, if the best way to fix it is to make people freeze, then let’s make ‘em freeze,” ’cause what’s important? I think the problem is these people are too absurd themselves to even understand absurdity. They are incapable of understanding the whole concept of illustrating absurdity by being absurd.”
The framing of the headline on Rush’s website says it all, “Outrage Over Harmless Michelle Obama Furnace and Obesity Joke.” See how they tried to reframe me as the angry, humorless, out of touch blogger? That was a nice touch. Now here is the truth. If you go back and listen to the audio, it is clear that Limbaugh was not kidding. He was not making a joke and there was no laughter as he spoke.
What happened was that Rush got busted and subsequently mocked for one of the many crackpot conspiracy theories that he floats to his radio audience every day, and he didn’t like being made fun of, and that is what was going on. We humorless liberals were making fun of Rush. I wasn’t taking him seriously, and that is what got under his skin.
This does mark the first time that I have ever had the pleasure of correcting Rush Limbaugh while he was attacking me, so let’s go over this again. Michelle Obama is not coming to take away your food or tell you what to eat. She is just the First Lady. She has no power to do anything. (I know what you were trying to do, Rush. I am not going to let you use my article to further your falsehoods about food and the First Lady, nice try though).
Rush, I promise you. You can eat all the McRibs you want, but only for a limited time, in your nice warm house. Michelle Obama is not coming to get you. Everything is going to be ok, but if you tell any more of your imaginary stories, I am going to be here to write about it.