Ohio Doesn’t Want Their Tan Man as Speaker of the House

Sep 03 2010 Published by under Featured News, Republican Party

Look, even my palm is orange!

Breaking Friday News: Ohio doesn’t want the Tan Man to become Speaker of the House. I bring this to you as Friday fodder and a possible drinking game. Also, it’s mildly pleasing. Happy holiday weekend.

No one in Ohio likes John Boehner (R-OH) much. You know Boehner, the orange man whose tan resembles actor George Hamilton, whom Obama referred to jokingly as “a person of color” at the 2009 White House Correspondent’s Dinner. Ah, our President. His wit does fly a tad above the target.

Out here in the real world, most people don’t know who Boehner is, and even in his home state, those that do don’t think much of him. However, his tan is infamous and the voters in his state report that they would like him more if he spent less time on his tan.
In fact, 30% of voters in the state think Boehner spends too much time on his tan, and only 4% aren’t sure if he spends enough time on his tan. Apparently no one polled the residents of Ohio regarding their feelings on the amount of time Johnny spends at the local watering hole, where he is said to be found around 5 PM.

SCARBOROUGH:” I hear it on the Hill, I’m sure you hear it on the Hill all the time, it’s not reported but so many Republicans tell me this is a guy that is not the hardest worker in the world. After 5 o’clock, 6 o’clock at night, he is disengaged at best. You can see him around town. He does not have, let’s say, the work hours of Newt Gingrich. … Every Republican I talk to says John Boehner by 5 or 6 o’clock at night, you can see him at bars. He is not a hard worker.”

He’s either spending a lot of time getting sprayed orange or he golfs every day before going to the bar. Both are admirable ways for him to serve the tax payers. After all, we all know government doesn’t work, especially when Republicans are at the helm, so I view this as a courtesy. The less time Boehner is working, the less time he has to mess up Ohio and this country. Thank you John!

But given that none of us know how Boehner gets his infamous orange glow, this gives us some insight into the veracity of polling in general and the mind set of the average American answering poll questions. After all, only 4% said they weren’t sure if he spent enough time on his tan. This is, of course, the great challenge facing our nation. To tan or not to tan! That is the question.

Public Policy Polling reports:

“It’s looking more and more likely that John Boehner will become Speaker of the House but he’s pretty unknown in Ohio and the folks who do have an opinion about him lean negative.

42% of Ohio voters say they don’t know enough about Boehner to rate him one way or the other. Among those who do 27% see him positively and 31% have an unfavorable view. Democrats (53%) dislike him more than Republicans (51%) like him and independents go against him by a 22/27 margin as well.

Only 28% of voters in the state want Boehner to become Speaker of the House if Republicans get the majority this fall while 44% explicitly say they want someone else and 28% are unsure. Republicans do by a 54/15 margin want Boehner to ascend to the top spot but Democrats (73/6) and independents (41/22) are not swayed by home state pride and think the GOP should pick someone else if they get in control.”

I’m so glad Republicans have Boehner as a symbol of hard work during these tough economic times.

Not to worry, soon Boehner will be almost as widely known as Pelosi. Oompa loompas of him will be all the rage this Christmas.

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